When someone wrongs you what is the first thing that you do? Get pissed, write them off, or kick their ass?! I know I personally tell them off and quite possibly never talk to them again. I think that there is something to be said for holding people accountable for being douche bags, and on the other hand there is something to be said for forgiveness.
I think the most important thing in this life that I have learned thus far is that people hurt people. Sometimes it's intentional and sometimes its unintentional. Regardless of the method you have to remember that at some point in our lives we all have wronged someone is some way. Meaning that we are not without our own malice.
The power of forgiveness is not to be underestimated. I have experienced some forgiveness both given and received. Both make your heart feel good but if you ask me giving forgiveness that has been denied for a long time, can really put your heart and mind in a very good place. Everyone wants and expects to be forgiven but not everyone is willing to give it. I hate to admit that I was one of those people...thinking that more people had wronged me or hurt me than I had done to other people. I guess we become so focused on our own pain that really when we get lost in it, and we forget to realize that are other people in our lives who have pain too. I have brilliantly called this victimization (is that a word?) oh well you know what I mean.
Victimization is very similar to narcissism. Everyone else is to blame for your plight, how others treat you make you behave the way you do, and all the shittyness in your life is because of all your pain. Trying to think of ways to not better yourself because you are just too damaged. Let me tell you that is all bullshit! I know that sounds so callous but let me tell you I have a right to speak on this issue. But that I am not ready to share....what I do want to share is my point. LOL.
I have been mad at so many people for so long. Thinking that somehow I was justified and no one was going to tell me any different. I severed many relationships because I thought I was "cleaning my emotional house". What I was really doing was pushing people away so I would not have to deal with any of it. I mean facing someone that has hurt you is really hard to do and then listen to their side of things and listen to them ask for forgiveness. It was just not something that I was interested in. I was too busy being a victim of all those people. What a fucking waste of so much of my life! While there are still people on my list that I hope to forgive someday, I have begun my journey of freeing my soul.
I have let go of some pretty big demons to rekindle and build relationships with people that I genuinely care about. I am not saying I am Mother Theresa all of sudden but I am just trying to be a better person. I think if someone is brave enough to say they are sorry and ask your forgiveness...you should be brave enough to accept it. Forgiveness does not mean what that person did was ok, it just means you have made peace and are ready to move on.
I think the most important thing in this life that I have learned thus far is that people hurt people. Sometimes it's intentional and sometimes its unintentional. Regardless of the method you have to remember that at some point in our lives we all have wronged someone is some way. Meaning that we are not without our own malice.
The power of forgiveness is not to be underestimated. I have experienced some forgiveness both given and received. Both make your heart feel good but if you ask me giving forgiveness that has been denied for a long time, can really put your heart and mind in a very good place. Everyone wants and expects to be forgiven but not everyone is willing to give it. I hate to admit that I was one of those people...thinking that more people had wronged me or hurt me than I had done to other people. I guess we become so focused on our own pain that really when we get lost in it, and we forget to realize that are other people in our lives who have pain too. I have brilliantly called this victimization (is that a word?) oh well you know what I mean.
Victimization is very similar to narcissism. Everyone else is to blame for your plight, how others treat you make you behave the way you do, and all the shittyness in your life is because of all your pain. Trying to think of ways to not better yourself because you are just too damaged. Let me tell you that is all bullshit! I know that sounds so callous but let me tell you I have a right to speak on this issue. But that I am not ready to share....what I do want to share is my point. LOL.
I have been mad at so many people for so long. Thinking that somehow I was justified and no one was going to tell me any different. I severed many relationships because I thought I was "cleaning my emotional house". What I was really doing was pushing people away so I would not have to deal with any of it. I mean facing someone that has hurt you is really hard to do and then listen to their side of things and listen to them ask for forgiveness. It was just not something that I was interested in. I was too busy being a victim of all those people. What a fucking waste of so much of my life! While there are still people on my list that I hope to forgive someday, I have begun my journey of freeing my soul.
I have let go of some pretty big demons to rekindle and build relationships with people that I genuinely care about. I am not saying I am Mother Theresa all of sudden but I am just trying to be a better person. I think if someone is brave enough to say they are sorry and ask your forgiveness...you should be brave enough to accept it. Forgiveness does not mean what that person did was ok, it just means you have made peace and are ready to move on.
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