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Clothesline capers!

Greetings and salutations!

Today I want to share another story from my childhood in which karma came and bit me in the ass...again!

Plans were set and in place, operation sneak out was a go!


As I climb out my bedroom window, hop up on the freezer, shimmy across the roof, and jump off the side into driveway...I see headlights coming down the road. I hit the deck just in time to see it turn before if even gets to my house, grrrrr! Whatever brush myself off and commence operation.



One block up and 1/2 block over is 3 of my friends and for tonight my accomplices. My neighborhood was very traditional, roads were straight and crossed each other. Blocks were actually blocks and everyone knew everyone, how I got away with half shit I did I will never really know. Except the fact that karma seemed to ensure I was punished accordingly. Now getting to my first friends house was easy he was already out and waiting for me. We have to leap frog the next 2 houses to get our 2nd accomplice, and he is just coming out to meet us. OMG we are thinking this is so awesome because everything is going so smooth. Then we cut behind to April's house and realize that her parents are still awake and their back door is open! SHIT!! Damn hippy parents anyways blaring their music having a good ol time. It becomes apparent that April is not going to be joining us. We turn back to retreat and notice that now my other friends parents are awake! So we stand there for a few minutes brain storming what we are going to do.

Its obvious to me that we need to just haul ass one by one through the back yard of April's house to make it the street on the other side. There were no fences in the way so it was an easy shot right?! Well first one goes...zoom! Success! 2nd one goes...zoom! Success! Now its my turn, being the athlete I was like ppfffft I got this! I start running...thud! Total blackness! I wake up flat on my back with my buddies slapping my face and saying my name over and over. I cant really see straight and I have the oddest feeling in my whole body. I asked what happened and all I can hear is laughing. As they are pulling me up and hustling me along I start to feel my neck burning and it really starts hurting like a bitch. Man what the hell happened?!




It appears that I have grossly overestimated the location of their wire clothesline. So in the process of hauling ass I clotheslined myself and consequently knocked my own ass out!! Yes almost took my freakin head off. The next day I could not move my shoulders, or head. It hurt to talk, walk, and even breathe. When my mom came home from work I lied of course and said this all went down this afternoon. She took me to the doctor where I was told that I was one lucky young lady. I had bruised my esophagus, trachea, and my lower jaw. Whew! Had to be sedentary a few days with some pain meds but otherwise healed just fine and lived to sneak out another day! 

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